the brain/nervous system

in a previous life i was - or wanted to be - a neuroscientist. half because of a sense of self-worth tied to the external - what a fancy frontier it is to say you understand and pursue understanding of the brain - how colonial, how supremacist. the field of neuroscience is steeped in white supremacy, legacies of eugenics, ableism, and present-day billionaires and billionaire-wannabees with a god complex pairing their genocidal destruction of earth with ventures aimed at preserving their selves in a cloud, so they may live on, virtually, in our robot-governed post-apocalyptica, forever. while these billionaires and their structures (including western-oriented 'science') must return to the earth should we have any chance of collective survival, i can also see that this god-lust and wish for escape is built on a deep-seated need for meaning historically met by religion or collectivity gradually replaced by science and the myth of progress. it is also borne out of suffering; how they must suffer in their armoured compounds with fear of a bullet at every turn. how much solace it must give to imagine eternal virtual life in a cloud - how much easier it is to imagine immortality than the end of their system of domination.

through illness and discovery i disentangled that other half sense - my fascination with what makes humans human - from the need to pursue and posture and validate it in the halls of power. we humans have understood and sought to understand the brain - or the essence of the human condition - for as long as we've had complex societies, and probably longer. this is my other half - the completely human, and at times completely consuming desire to make sense of how this mass of electrical water and fat gives rise to wonder, art, hate, and love. mostly love.

these days i situate an exploration of the brain and nervous system in the millenia-old lineage of liberation. what do we need to know about our brains, our conductors, the ancient, the wise, the commandeering parts of our nervous systems, in order to free ourselves from suffering and allow us to live as authentic selves, liberated from lineages of trauma and harmful patterns, and in doing so transform our relationships with those we love and fight with, and transform the world.